Monday, August 10, 2009

You Might Be a Wood Badger If.......

If you've ever been driving at 60 MPH and suddenly slammed on the brakes because you thought you saw a Patrol critter at a yard sale...

If you've ever received a speeding ticket because you were running late and you were afraid you might miss THE SONG...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you've ever found yourself spending ten dollars or more playing a game of chance at a carnival because the top prize was a stuffed Kudu...

If you were ever late for work because you couldn't find your patrol flag...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If your yard has grass 10 inches high but Gilwell Field looks great...

If instead of a night out with the boys, you prefer a night out with the "Bears" or "Owls" or "Beavers"...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you hang your tent totem on the doorknob of the Holiday Inn while on family vacation...

If you think your spouses new rock garden would look perfect with "A THING" in it...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you get disappointed at family reunions because no one wants to build a catapult...

If you've ever taken out a loan so you had a $100 dollar bill to measure your neckerchief...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you thought Thanksgiving dinner was ruined because you ran out of peanut butter...

If you think Bunyon burgers and Cobbler are two of the five major food groups...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If the fountain at your wedding had bug juice...

If your baby's first words were, "Back to Gilwell" ...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you think the National Anthem is "When it's Hog Calling Time Here at Wood Badge"...

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you don't understand why tuxedos don't come with neckerchiefs and knee socks...

If your Coat of Arms features a Kudu...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you think campfire building should be an Olympic sport...

If you have 2 lawn mowers that don't work and a broken storm door, but a perfectly good Table Totem...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you've ever cried because your spouse threw out a container of old ashes (and they weren't Uncle Pete)...

If your idea of a trip to the HolyLand means Gilwell Park in England...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If the only thing you remember from your honeymoon is the herd of Antelope you drove by in Wyoming...

If you've ever worn your Scout Uniform to your children's' wedding ...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you list tin foil cooking as a skill on your resume...

If the directions to your house say, "Turn left at the "THING"...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you've gone to a Hooters restaurant and didn't realize there were girls there...

If you bought that '89 Chevy Caprice for the fleur-de-lis hood ornament...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If your favorite color is olive drab...

If you decided to lash together the new deck on the back of your house...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you plan to serve foil meals at your next dinner party...

If you walk the streets in broad daylight with a coffee cup and flashlight hanging from your belt...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you raise your hand to the Scout Sign at a heated business meeting...

If you were arrested by airport security because you wouldn't give up your pocketknife until he said "thank you"...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you don't mind losing power to your house for 3 days...

If your son hides his copy of Boy's Life from you (get your own)...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If your plans for remodeling the bathroom include digging the hole deeper...

If you trade your 25 foot center console fishing boat for a 15 foot canoe...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If your favorite movie is "Follow Me Boys" and you spent months trying to convince Disney to release it on home video....

If you disconnect the automatic dishwasher in favor of the "3 pot method"...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you sneak a cup of bug juice after your spouse goes to bed...

If you felt you won a moral victory when the BSA brought back knee socks...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you think campaign hats are cool...

If you gave your wife a mummy bag rated for -15 degrees for Christmas...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you named one of your kids Baden...

If you and your spouse consider "Camp Granada" by Allen Sherman to be your song...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you can't eat eggs anymore unless they are cooked in a plastic bag ...

If you plan to get rich by writing a best selling Dutch Oven cookbook...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you took a chemistry course at a local college to help you develop a better fire starter...

If you actually own a left-handed smoke shifter...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If the high point of your social season is the Wood Badge feast...

If a trip to Philmont is a pilgrimage...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If you are convinced the center of the universe is Gilwell Park, England...

If the sales operators at the BSA distribution center's 800 number recognize your voice...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If singing "On My Honor" makes you cry uncontrollably...

If you were disappointed when Boys Life didn't win the Pulitzer Prize last year...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!
If bug repellant smells like perfume...

If you know the times trains leave for Chingford from Liverpool...
...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

...You Might Be A Wood Badger!

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